Flashback Friday - Summer Time

May 2007.

I was getting ready to make a big move. To California. I was so in love and heartbroken all at the same time. I was terrified and excited because I had never lived away from my parents. I was so ready, and yet so unprepared.

That day, which I can’t even remember the exact date that I left (I'm sure it's written down in one of my journals), but it was one of the best days of my life. I traveled across New Mexico, Arizona, and finally California. My family came with me because they knew we’d get lost, or run into some car trouble (which we did), and none of us knew ANYTHING about how to fix it or read a map correctly. LOL! I remember seeing the California sign as we crossed the state lines. I remember the mountains, the winding road, and the sun getting ready to go down. My brother was driving, Kim was in the passengers seat and I was in the back so giddy and excited. I can remember my stomach doing summer saults. My brother put in this song:

And that was my grand entrance into California. A few days later my parents were getting ready to leave, and I was crying. We all were crying actually. Even my dad and my brother. :-) I remember seeing them leave and feeling so alone, so uncertain, and yet so independent. I think I cried for them for at least a good month. But, my time in California was really and truly amazing. I learned a lot and I had a lot of fun out there! The good times, the bad times, and the worst of times were all completely worth it. I fell in love with it.

Fallbrook, Ca 2007- My Boyfriend (now husband) and I

I sometimes question myself on why I pushed for us to come back. But mainly, I question myself on whether I will ever get to go back. I wish that we could go back one day. With all of my heart, I wish we could. Unfortunately, there is really nothing financially smart about us going back. Here at least we both have jobs. We are lucky to have a sitter that loves our daughter and refuses to take any more than $70 (which I had to force) a week. We have financial support if we need it. And despite things being a little crazy, sometimes a bit miserable, we’re getting by. We’re doing ok. I know several people out there that aren’t as lucky. And they keep saying it's only going to get worse.

I really want to go visit soon. If we can’t ever move back out there, then I at least want to take vacations out there. I almost bought tickets last week (they were $260 round trip-nonstop flight!) but then our “Check Engine” light came on, so we have to wait and see what that problem is before making any big spending decision. Plus, it would probably deplete our savings account. Which would mean something bad would happen, just because. Still, I really wish we could have gone. 

What fun that would have been...