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Wordless Wednesday

This is 32

If I could sum up this past year in one word it would be: Challenging. Not just because of everything that's been going on lately in my personal life. But also because of what's been going on at work. Parenting lately has also been really...trying. My health has been up and down this year as well. I actually had a second blood draw this morning in hopes of having clearer answers. This has also been a year of unlearning. Unlearning the negative thoughts about myself. Doing things on my own and being OKAY with that. Sitting still and being comfortable with feeling lonely. And it's been a challenge to let go of what I had hoped my future would be like. Instead, I'm having to embrace the blank slate that's set before me.

If I could describe the past year in one word it would be: Blessed. There's so much out there that I know is good. I have people in my life who truly care about me. People who love me. My daughter is happy and healthy. She's doing well in school. And our bond is so damn strong. I'm blessed to have her and her unconditional love. I've also been able to nurture friendships that I hadn't really tended to in a while. Each of us busy with our own lives, but finally taking the steps needed to get back in touch. My parents have been a huge help and I have no idea what I would do without them. And I'm learning more about myself each day. What I want out of life and in a career. The kind of people that I want to surround myself with and the ones that I don't. I'm doing my best to be a practicing Catholic and really listen to what my faith offers. I'm doing my best to stay positive, even when life is handing out some real doozies. I'm doing the best that I can to take it all in stride and with a grateful heart. 

And now, here's hoping for more adventures. More writing and less time on my phone. More friendships and quiet moments. Enjoying the little things and hopefully getting some much-needed balance.  Here's to finally being able to start putting money away for my "international travels" trip that I would like to take one day. And finally getting my passport. Here's to more days filled with family and laughter. To making some boss lady moves and learning more about myself. And here's to 32. To what comes next. Because I know that there's so much more waiting for me in this life and I'm just getting started. 

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Life Lately

So, it's been a minute. 😀 We've actually had a lot going on this month. More dramatic than I would like for it to be. BUT we are getting through this season and I just needed to take some time away from a lot of things to get my head on straight again. I've actually written a lot in my journals and a few drafts on here that I just didn't have the balls to publish. For one, the story is not mine to tell...yet. And second, it's all still very fresh/raw for me. There were some things that I typed up, that had I published, I would not have been able to take back. So, instead, they'll just sit there in my drafts. Until I'm ready to let them go. 

For now, let me do a little catch-up post. During the middle of September, some of my family from Georgia came down for a wedding. I was able to see my cousin Omi and found out that she was expecting her first little one. Em was able to spend time with cousins that were her own age. And there was a lot of coffee, pan dulce, and good conversations. I've always said that my family getting together is one of my "happy places". But it can also be overwhelming and tiring when everyone has to be wrangled just to make a trip to the store. I wouldn't trade it for the world though. My family makes me happy.  

On the first weekend of October, Em and my dad ran a one-mile fun run. There was money on the line for her which was added motivation. But y’all, my little girl has the makings of a runner. Whether she’ll ever utilize it or not, that’s still to be seen. She can cover some distance with her long strides, and she can keep up a steady pace too. She and my dad were the first in their group to cross the finish line. They were doused in color and And I couldn't have been more proud. 

This week Em was invited to ride on her gym's parade float this upcoming Saturday. We've been to several of these parades and she always sees the other girls in advance levels that get to ride on their float. Usually, she'd just wave and call out to the girls she knew. Afterward, she'd ask me if she'd ever get to ride on one or be a part of the team. I normally had no answer for her other than, "Maybe in the next one, honey." And well, the invitation finally came. She's so excited that this weekend she'll finally be able to be a part of it with the rest of the team. She's worked really hard to advance quickly in level two. Her goal is to be in level three by the end of this school year, if not sooner. She's already received her ribbons, two weeks in a row, for new skill achievements. And her coach says that she's on the right track to hit her goal.

And that's about all I have for now. The next seven to ten days will bring with them a lot of birthdays and celebrations. This weekend will be a three day weekend for me which I'm so grateful to have. I foresee some coconut milk chocolate ice cream, and a Netflix binge session because I'm old and lame. I'm also hoping for some good news on Monday or Tuesday that I'll be able to share with y'all. And I'm still trying to get a second job in the afternoons and weekends too, but so far I haven't had any luck. I'm in desperate need of some extra income too. So, if y'all could send me some good vibes or keep me in your prayers I would really appreciate it. Until the next post, I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!

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Wordless Wednesday

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Wordless Wednesday

October Magick

This is my month, y’all! This is the month that brings a sense of renewal for me. It’s a time when the leaves start to change and the weather gets cooler. It’s a time when there’s a bit of magick in the air and everything feels heightened. It’s a time when I can actually start to see the progress I’ve made (or haven’t made) in the year. There’s always been this energy and excitement that comes with October for me, and somehow I got really lucky because Emery shares that same joy. There’s an extra bit of sparkle and a little bit of spooky in our day-to-day that makes this month so much fun for her. This morning she hopped out of bed with excitement in her eyes and a wide smile. “Mom! It’s October 1st!” she said. “It’s here, baby girl, it’s here!” I replied as I rushed to put mousse in my hair with one hand and brush my teeth with the other. We were running a little late so the excitement was a tad short-lived. But how cool is it to be able to share that feeling with your kid, huh? We both absolutely love this time of year!

via GIPHY

Most of our outside Halloween decorations are up. I also had an impulse buy and got “The Nightmare Before Christmas” themed light projector for our living room. I need to grab a few decorations for my alter next week and I think I’ll be set for the month. We have a whole selection of movies picked out that we’ll be watching throughout the month too. I’ve finally decided on reading “The Vine Witch” while Emery has picked, “Small Spaces” by Katherine Arden. I’m stocked up on hot teas and we’re looking at several “Halloween” themed crafts to do for the month. Plus, the new animated Addams Family movie comes out next Friday and we’re going to see it sometime next weekend. I’m hoping to get at least one night hike squeezed in this month or at the very least a day trip to Dinosaur Valley. Fingers crossed! 

Those aren’t the only things that we’ll be doing though. As much as I enjoy the scary, haunting, and magickal side of October, this year on the Catholic side, we’ll be celebrating the “Month of the Holy Rosary”. This is my first year of being back with my church. I technically haven’t met all of the requirements to be considered a “practicing Catholic” I’m doing my best. And this month is dedicated to one of the most powerful prayers that we have. Most people will commit to praying the rosary every day during this month, which is a beautiful thing. However, I’m not quite there yet. So for me, I’ve decided that I’ll try my best to pray the rosary at least once a week. Ideally, I'd like to recite it before bed on Sunday, but we’ll see how it goes. I still have a lot to learn but this has actually been a very interesting journey in rediscovering my faith. I'm pretty happy about my progress so far. 

Now, I know I stated before that I was looking for a second job. Well, I still am and I’ve sent in my application to a company in town that has a part-time seasonal opening. Regardless of whether I get the job or have to continue my search I still plan on doing as much as I can with Emery. If that means cutting out everything else I have going on then that’s a sacrifice I'm more than willing to make. Because Emery comes first for me, and I only get her at this age for so long. I want to experience all of this October Magick with my baby girl for as many years as I can get. If that means making sacrifices in other areas of my life to get it, then that's what I'll do. But we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Until then, Happy October everyone! May it bring you as much joy as it does to us. 👻