Since we moved into town we've been pretty preoccupied with getting settled and figuring out the best routine that works for us. I'm still in the process of putting left over stuff in storage and up-cycling some furniture that we desperately need in order to keep our house organized. Our clothes currently reside in separate laundry baskets. So even though we've seen most of our surrounding neighbors we haven't really gotten to know them. And I won't lie, I really haven't put in the effort to get to know them either. How un-neighborly of me I know. But recently, we've had a little boy come over every afternoon to ask for Emery. And this has just made me all...frazzled?
I know that Emery making friends is a good thing. I also know that I don't want to be a "helicopter parent" because I believe that's just hurting your kids more in the long run. But, I can't believe we're already getting to that stage. You know the one where your kid(s) asking you constantly "Can I go out and play with *insert other kids name here*?" rather than just chill at home with you. I get that it's bound to happen, but c'mon she's FOUR! I guess I assumed that we still had at least another year before "friends" would be a huge deal. Alas, we've been getting a lot of: "Mom can **** come over and watch a movie?" or "Mom can I go and jump on the trampoline with ****?" And if we say no, there is A LOT of pouting being done. Sometimes, some huffing and on occasion some crying.
Unfortunately, because of this recent development my fears and paranoia have hit an all time high. We live in a small town, but even this small town has it's "rough" side. In fact, it has two. And can you guess where our neighborhood is? Yup, about three blocks away from one of them. So, anytime Emery is outside either my husband or I have to be watching her at all times. This is probably considered "helicopter parenting", but again I will repeat, she is FOUR. Apparently, this is strange for the little boy who's always wanting her to go outside and play. He's even vocalized the "weirdness" of us "always watching" and not letting her play outside by herself. The poor kid has no idea that by making such statements, it only made things a lot worse.
You see, this little dude is seven years old. SEVEN. Now, I know that not everyone out there are a bunch of perverts but honestly you never know. I have no idea what his family life is like or what he's allowed to watch. Or what he's not but does anyway. I've met his parents once in passing and I try to hold off my judgement of other people because we all parent differently. That said we've been here for almost two months now and we've noticed that the two youngest get left at home ALONE for very long periods of time a lot. Again, not my business.They also have several cookouts throughout the week that consists of many males of various ages, and a lot of liquor and beer. I know that this could all be completely innocent. A bunch of compadres kicking it after a long day at work? I've also considered that my mind could be getting the best of me, but I'm just not willing to allow my daughter to "hang out" or be anywhere near them unsupervised. Ever.
This kid is persistent though. He comes over EVERY afternoon. And he questions everything too. If we don't allow Emery outside then he wants to know why? And if he can't convince us to let her out then he asks if he can come in and watch TV with us. Since I can't really tell him no, I usually let him in with a curfew of 8:30. So, this had me thinking that maybe he's lonely? Maybe he's just curious? Maybe he's not given attention at home? But then again this little boy isn't all that innocent either. I caught him & his older brother lying on the first day that he came over. We had bought Frozen and some pizza when he came knocking on our door to see if Emery could come out. It was almost 7:30 and the sun was going down so I told him she couldn't. Instead I invited him to join us for the movie and pizza if he okay'd it with his parents first. That little stinker left for 5 minutes, came back, and said his mom was fine with it. About thirty minutes later I witnessed his mother and father pull up. Maybe he called them? Ten minutes later the oldest is running over, knocking on our door looking embarrassed, and telling us that his brother needs to get home.
I know that they're only kids. I know that Emery's going to make friends, some good and some not so good. I know that this is all part of her growing up. And unless I lock her up in her room (which I may or may not have considered) there really is no avoiding this. In fact, it's probably going to get worse. Eventually she's going to want to hang out away from home. Gees, my heart just jumped at the thought. But this is all new territory for us! My husband and I were discussing what we should do about this kid and we weren't entirely too sure how to go about dealing with him. I mean, can you even deal with a seven year old? Do we just take it day by day? Do we let him know that Emery has rules at home that she can't break? Do we talk with his parents? How do we not come off as insulting when we tell them all interactions between our kids should be supervised? There are sooo many things to considered and think about. And quite frankly it's giving me a migraine.
