Wordless Wednesday

A Small Dream

Recently, I've been really thinking about what I want to do with my life. Not just in my marriage, or in terms of school either. Though school is still back on the table. But also in what I truly enjoy out of life. Consistently. Because a degree can only take you so far. You see, I've always said that I wanted to get a degree in Business Admin., or Marketing so that I wouldn't be limited to a specific kind of work. That was the end game, a stepping stone to grow, and maybe move out of this town. See the world. The problem is that it's always felt like a "means to an end". It's like I'm choosing that particular field of study only to get better, and not because it's something I'm truly interested in. When talking about how I felt stumped or stuck the one phrase I kept hearing was "do what you love". Once that happens you start to give more. Start to enjoy more. Feel confident in what you're doing, and like you have a purpose. Doing what you love to do makes it less about working for a paycheck, and more about feeling productive and content. 

Now, I always see women, and men who join companies like "It Works!", "Advocare", or "Origami Owl" (just to name a few) which are basically pyramid companies that they use to supplement their income. I'm not knocking these either so if you're a part of these don't get your feathers all ruffled. Honestly, if you can make a living doing this, and you enjoy it then more power to you honey! I actually have several friends that have joined, and I've even been asked to join up under them with the promise of earning extra money which is always tempting. The thing is that you have to sell a product, and you have to incorporate these items into basically everything (especially social media). It also usually requires a lot of enthusiasm on your part to be pushing those products ALL of the time. And I just couldn't see myself doing that. So that's why I always decline the offers to become a rep, or join a certain "family"/ brand. It's just not for me. 

​However, that idea of finding what I enjoy to do stuck with me. Or more like it became this nagging little thought that I just couldn't shake. ​The idea of finding a passion, and pursuing it was actually really appealing. So a few weeks ago, before all of my personal drama started to surface and wreak havoc, I started to really look at my life. I asked myself some questions​ about what I wanted to do. What were some goals that I had? Did I want to continue with my​ current job?​ Did I enjoy what I was doing?​ Should I scale back on my hours to create a better work/life balance? ​Would​ I ​rather work from home instead? ​Would I rather be doing something else entirely? If I had the money, or the financial backing what would I enjoy creating? ​Did I want to stay in my little town​, or look elsewhere? What could I do to make a difference? How could I help others, and could I find a job that would allow me to do so? What in my life didn't seem like so much work, and ​what was the cause of most of the ​stress? What did I enjoy doing? What was a constant for me?​ And surprisingly (or not if you really think about it) some of the answers to those questions revolved around books.

I love books. I like to read them, read about them, discover new authors, and have discussions. I'm always recommending books to others, or even looking for recommendations myself. So, I came to the conclusion that I would really love to own/run my own bookstore. We live in a small town, and the only major bookstore we had was shut down about a year ago due to a a failed buyout/bankruptcy. We now have a total of two stores that sell books, and the selections as well as hours of operation are all over the place. The majority of the books are old, used, and the selection available is very limited. I would like to bring more into our community that would allow people of all ages to find something interesting. Add a wider selection, and offer something different atmosphere wise. I'd also love to use some of the proceeds each month to donate to a charity or church. When I talked to a few people about this idea I was mainly asked what the point of a bookstore would be in this day, and whether I even saw it being successful long term. ​​I'm aware that we are in a digital age, and e-readers are really popular. However there's always a market for people who want physical copies of books, and even more so if they're affordable. I believe that kids and adults alike would enjoy a place to sit down, and open up a book. I miss having that space, and I'm sure I'm not the only one. So, that's my dream. To have my own shop. To be my own boss. To raise my daughter around books that can open up worlds to her. Whether I'll be able to do it or not, I have no idea. Right now it's just an idea. A dream. Hopefully it leads to some big things though. 

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