Cry It Out

 More Like SCREAM BLOODY MURDER!

OK, I've been reading a lot of different blogs that advocate the “Cry It Out” method for sleep time. And this sounds, lovely. I mean, to be able to have our own bed back would be auh-mazing! To not get kicks to the head because somehow my daughter miraculously turned herself around would be fantastic on a level you couldn’t even imagine (or some of you can)!! But here’s my problem- SHE CRIES SCREAMS!! It's not just these little-muffled cries, I’m talking about screams! She hates being in her crib. It's like she's terrified of being alone. I’ve left her in there for 30 minutes and I kid you not that little monster NEVER stopped crying screaming. She paused TWICE just to catch her breath. And it's hard to tell the difference between her angry screams and her terrified screams because they're pretty much the same. So what am I doing wrong people?

I know I probably should not have “co-slept” due to the SIDS risk, but breastfeeding was so much easier like that! And in my defense, I hardly knew anything about SIDS then. –Yes, I know, shame on me.- I’m sorry! I woke up at every little move Em made and I always slept with no pillow and only one sheet (which was kept at my waist for the most part). Once it got cold, Em was put in one of those swaddling suits and slept on top of the covers on her back. So I should get some brownie points for that, no? And now, I’m sidetracking...

Anywho, I’ve been trying to let her cry scream, but it gets to be too much. And that face! O..m...g the face she makes is like you completely broke her heart which is something we as parents aren't supposed to do, right? We're supposed to want to prevent heartbreaks, right? I try to not look at her when she’s crying screaming but sometimes after about 20 minutes it sounds like she’s heaving so I peek, and then I’m a goner. My weakness, I guess. Then, if we finally get her to sleep and put her in her crib, she wakes up at some random hour and she’ll start crying. We keep a night light on, but even if we wait a few minutes her cries don’t dwindle down like most babies, they get higher. And I don’t know about you, but a child crying very loudly at 2:45 am is the LAST thing you want to deal with. And I’m sure my brother (who has to wake up at 4 am) and my husband (who has to be up at 5 am) really don’t want to be awakened by a screaming child. So, I pick her up and bring her to bed with me. She falls right to sleep and doesn’t wake up again till 6 am when it’s time for us to get up for the day. But get this, if I let her sleep with us, she’s out from 8 pm till 6 am (unless she’s sick or she falls asleep earlier than 8 pm).

So what should I do? Keep trying the CIO method and pray that somehow she starts to self-soothe? This will have me waking up throughout the night because now that I am up to speed on SIDS, I worry way too much. I peak in to see if she’s not on her tummy if her paci’s still in her mouth, and I get eye level with her mattress to make sure I can see her breathing. -Yup, I’m that mother.- So, in that time between 8 pm and the random hour of 2:45 am I can’t sleep comfortably because I’m waking up to constantly check on her. Or should I continue as is and just deal with the kicks? Because that seems to be the only way I can get a somewhat good nights sleep. But in the end, it will lead to some more difficult times ahead once she gets older and does have to sleep in her own bed...?

Oh, decisions, decisions.

Happy Friday!!

This weekend is going to be crazy! We're about to put down some new flooring and I'm getting ready to repaint the whole house! One (or two) rooms at a time, and then finally hopefully repaint the outside too. We live in a POS right now (I'll post about that at another time) and only recently have we had the money to start fixing it up. Baby steps, I know, but I'm just excited that this project is getting started in the first place!! 

Wish us luck!! 

Sick, Broken, and Standing

Crap, people. Crap!

Tuesday night, my little monster started getting sick. I was up with her till about 5 am Wednesday morning. She had some major diarrhea and vomiting. On top of that, I was sick too. I guess the bug finally caught up with me. A runny nose, sore throat, and body aches. It was NOT fun at all. She developed a massive rash and I think it might be a yeast infection, but I can’t be sure. If it doesn’t go away by tonight I’m calling them and MAKING them find time to see her. I don’t care if I have to walk in and sit in that waiting room all day. I tried going to work, but Em was just crying and screaming. I could tell she didn’t even want to be moved. So I decided to stay home. She did get a bit dehydrated that day, but we couldn’t schedule her in for an appointment because they were booked. She hadn’t thrown up since that morning so I just asked for some advice. Clear fluids, pedialyte, and lots of rest are what they told me. And that’s just what we did for most of the day.

Fast forward to about 2 pm and Em is feeling better. Enough to want to play with the contents in mommy’s purse. I was doing laundry and really was just thrilled that she was in the mood to do anything that I really didn’t care! Well, she dumped everything out (which is normal), but what I didn’t know is that she had placed my phone right behind my foot. So when I saw her dragging my purse behind her, in front of me, I just assumed my phone was still in there. Nope!! When I took a step back...I felt it. It didn’t crack, just a tiny little glitch in the screen. I assumed it would survive. Nope!! An hour later I wondered why I hadn’t gotten a text from the hubs. Sure enough, the phone was dead. I tried to recharge it and hook it up to the computer. Nadda. That’s what I get for assuming. So, there goes my phone. My lovely connection to the outside world (we have no internet -I have to stand in just the right corner to bounce off the grocery stores wifi- or TV at home). All of those pictures and videos are GONE. That really really upsets me. And now with all of our extra money going into fixing up the house, there is NO room for a new phone. So, I am going phoneless. :-(

In happier news, my little monster stood up on her own last night!! She’s been doing this on the bed, and only for a few seconds at a time, but never while on the floor. But yesterday she was on the floor in her room and she stood by herself for more than 30 seconds! She wobbled a little bit, which scared her for a second, but then I started clapping and saying “Yay!!” and she just lit up! She started clapping with me and she just stood there for a bit longer! It was so exciting to get to see that!! Won’t be too long before I’m having to chase after her!

Today I am still sick. Em is doing better. And it’s back to work! Hope everyone else is having a better week!!