Today, I’m not feeling up to writing about one particular thing. It’s been a day and I’m a little tired. My brain is just not wanting to focus either. So, instead, I’m just going to write down some random thoughts as they come. See where it takes me…
Y’all, I have no idea what I was thinking when I decided on going back to school. I’m one week in and already I feel like I’m being chewed up and spat out. Two of my classes are giving me a fair shot. The other two seem to be setting me up for failure. I seriously cried after my third Business Math session. And what's worse, is that this school just doesn’t seem to worry about, care, or offer resources for non-traditional students like me. Forget having a full-time job while going to school because chances are that everything will be done during the same 8-5 window and if you can’t get the time off you're screwed. On top of that, you’re viewed as just another student ID number by the advisors and that’s a pretty crappy feeling. But what can you do? Well, nothing. I just have to suck it up and do my best!
Lately, I’ve had his feeling of wanting to be motivated to work out. I want to go to the gym and I want to work up a sweat. It just hasn’t happened. Nor do I know where I would find the time. Of course, people will give me the whole, “You make time for what’s important” spiel, and you know what? ZIP IT. I like getting rest, okay? So when people come at me with that they're basically asking me whether working out is more important than getting sleep. And whether I want to function on copious amounts of caffeine. Which is totally possible because I've done it before. But doing this again would wreak havoc on my body and decrease my chances of ever conceiving again. I already struggle enough in that area as it is so- pass. Between work, school, studying, meeting my daughter’s needs, attending her activities, spending time with my fiance, AND keeping our house in order - where do I find the time? At 4 am? At 11pm at night? Do I need to push myself into running on 5 hours of sleep or less each day? And if I did, realistically how would I even keep that up? I’m totally open to suggestions.
Also, I still haven’t decided on my word for this year. I’ve had a few contenders, and there’s one in particular that’s been coming up a lot lately. In my daily readings and in my writings. I’m still praying on it though but I’m pretty sure I’ll have it narrowed down by the beginning of February. If you’ve been around this blog for a while maybe you can guess which word it is?
Anywho, this seems like a good stopping point for today. I really want some chocolate and a day filled with watching Hallmark movies. I’ve had headaches off and on since school started and I can already tell they’re going to be a constant thing until the end of May. Anyway, I hope this didn’t give you too much whiplash. How has everyone else’s new year started off? I pray it’s been a good one. Any big plans or goals for 2021? Until the next post! Stay safe & have a wonderful week.
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