Last week was Spring Break for us and while that normally stirs up images of vacations and the beach, we stayed put. I was slammed at work, staying after hours most evenings. I didn’t get very many opportunities to write. But I did manage to fit in a few afternoon runs thanks to the time change, and one early morning workout. Still not sure how I feel about that. Anyway, sometimes I get bummed out that we can’t afford to take time off to have a vacation. Anyone else? Like, you know that you need that break, that check-out, but you just can’t afford to do it? This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately.
I’ve been trying to figure out how other people afford to get by right now, and still manage to save money to take their families on vacations. How do people afford house payments and vehicle payments with rates so high? The price of groceries is through the roof too. It’s something we’ve been struggling with lately - even on a budget. We’ve had to say “NO” to a lot of things lately (baby showers, home repairs, birthday parties, etc.) because we can’t afford to spend extra. And we constantly talk about how we have to sacrifice now for rewards later. But we’ve been sacrificing for years. And with each passing one, it just seems like something else comes up.
Yes, we have managed to pay down debt, and we are doing the best we can to cut costs. As I mentioned in a previous post, we wanted to either buy a home or remodel our current one. But those plans keep getting pushed back, and it’s really frustrating. However, realistically we can’t afford to take on any more payments. So, we do what we can. And we live paycheck to paycheck for the most part. And that has left me feeling very disappointed with myself. Because I honestly thought I’d be much further along than I am right now. Even with a Bachelor’s degree, my salary is on the lower end. I thought I’d be making more money by now. I thought I would be a homebuyer by now too. And I thought I’d be able to afford to take a vacation at least once a year - even if it was close by. I thought I’d have more in my savings (job issues have drained that). And I thought life would be a little easier.
Some people (read: my husband) think it’s superficial and materialistic to want so many things. “You’ll never be happy with more if you can’t be content/grateful for what you have now.” And to an extent, I get it. Which is why I try to appreciate what I do have. A vehicle that gets me from point A to point B. Our relatively good health. Clothing and shoes. A roof over our heads. And the ability to buy food and medicine when needed. There really is a lot to be grateful for. That said, I don’t think it’s wrong or bad to want a home that doesn’t constantly have issues (electricity/plumbing/sewer problems, mold, no closet in our bedroom, bug problems - last year it was crickets and wolf spiders). I don’t think it’s wrong to want financial stability either. To be able to purchase a baby shower gift or set a doctor’s appointment without worrying about which bill it will take away from. And I don’t think it’s a bad thing to want to explore and travel a bit - without having to camp out because it’s the cheapest. I’m not against camping, but my back is not a fan. And so, I feel that I should have achieved more in life by now. I feel like I’m failing a bit at this whole adulting thing. And I really feel like I’m failing my family.
Anyway, that’s enough word vomit for now. Sorry this post is such a downer. It’s just how I’m feeling right now. I know that we are slowly chipping away at what needs to be paid down. I know that my concerns are valid, and I’m doing my best. Still, sometimes finances are tight, and it makes life a little hard. But we’ll get through it though - we always do.
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